Bookmark’d (1st Revision)

I smile at what was,
And cry for what could have been.
Lifes little choices
Ripple the waters of discontent.
I have felt true love,
The That blinding passion
That Which comes only once in a lifetime.
Oh, how I’ve chased that dragon,
But always found it wanting.
As Memories of you choke my sanity-

Fucking Sex in the roommate’s car
And breaking a hotel bed;
Holding hands into the sunset
And lying on the beach,
Our bodies linked perfectly together;
My head resting on a log,
Never wanting to let go,
But I let go…
All those years ago…
I fucking let go.

Now I choke on your tears,
those the tears shed when I panicked
And ran from you to die in war.
Headfirst, I went into the flames-
Full steam and ravaged by fear-
Die, I did, but only in my the mind
And not even completely,
For the memories remain
Like lucid dreams.
I see you everywhere.

I mourn for that which I ran from.
My body toils on
As the sour agony of my heart
Replays the sweetness of your tongue.
Farewell, my love.
There’s still so much to explain-
So much to tell,
But what for?
It serves only me now.
‘Tis right I suffer.

This chapter in your book finishes;
A transition is marked in sweat and cum,
And laughter and hugs,
And then silence.
But I can’t let go…
Not yet- 
Not from something so true.
So, I back into the wood line
And sit on the tailgate.
I slide With a bookmark snug in against the last page,
And I start from the beginning.

–SMW–